we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
