there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
