I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
