No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
she told me i tasted like america
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
