Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
