we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
