My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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