one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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