New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
