what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
