Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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