Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
