Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?

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  (360): is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect? (503): Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam? http://tfl.nu/p9dl
  Replies (71) Good night (6524) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.

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  (847): I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning. http://tfl.nu/5xxn
  Replies (20) Good night (3678) Bad night (1230)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.

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  (815): I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed. http://tfl.nu/hsgt
  Replies (35) Good night (1853) Bad night (6819)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game

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  (302): I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game http://tfl.nu/wh7c
  Replies (10) Good night (4562) Bad night (922)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....

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  (310): Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google.... http://tfl.nu/f2r9
  Replies (16) Good night (5476) Bad night (1259)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.

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  (603): Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk. http://tfl.nu/ivw8
  Replies (32) Good night (18214) Bad night (1493)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place

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  (360): im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place http://tfl.nu/ws4h
  Replies (5) Good night (874) Bad night (2977)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"

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  (707): I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition" http://tfl.nu/pg7b
  Replies (8) Good night (3122) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona

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  (503): still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona http://tfl.nu/3dwf
  Replies (8) Good night (1252) Bad night (2812)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink

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  (570): I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink http://tfl.nu/d7kc
  Replies (5) Good night (1173) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck

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  (512): scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck http://tfl.nu/04pl
  Replies (6) Good night (2529) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.

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  (609): Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka. http://tfl.nu/ktyc
  Replies (4) Good night (1241) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.

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  (813): Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick. http://tfl.nu/1ytv
  Replies (7) Good night (1508) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.

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  (720): I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer. http://tfl.nu/osbe
  Replies (8) Good night (1466) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.

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  (330): just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue. http://tfl.nu/y6r9
  Replies (4) Good night (667) Bad night (577)

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