To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
