so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
