Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize