The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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