we have pet lesbian snakes
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Also, beer. Big fan.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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