this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
