Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
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Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
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So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My vagina just clenched in fear
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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