Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
