Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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