we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
