Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize