ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
