Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
