am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Randomize
