Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize