he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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