Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
