"it" just moved
I haven't been this sober since birth.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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