Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
So much Jack, so little girl.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize