guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
