I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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