I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize