Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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