Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
