Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
