nutella sex= disaster
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just want to make out with him forever
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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