Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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