he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
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She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
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You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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