Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize