Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
