Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
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