he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize