he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
and you fell through a lawn chair
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
