who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
