what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
