you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
God, I missed his penis.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
