Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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