Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
